Blog, memories

Makin’ Do

Image Courtesy of Pixabay (cropped)

I had a great catch-up conversation with a good friend today. We were discussing relationships and life lessons around money. We shared stories about being young and struggling to feed ourselves and our families when there was no one else to rely on.

The conversation stirred some memories. The funny thing about memories is you can either remember and reflect, or go back and swim in it. I choose reflecting.

During my first marriage, times were tough. I loved my husband but he was not reliable when it came to holding down a job, God rest his soul. At the time I was working in a pottery factory finishing bowls. The clay was poured into large plaster molds. The combined weight of the mold and the weight clay took some strength to lift on and off the racks. It was hard work.

When I found out I was pregnant, I could no longer do the job which made finances very tight. Finding enough money to pay bills AND eat was challenging. But I was in love and love conquers all, right?

My in-laws had a large garden as most people did. One fall weekend, we went to help pick shelly beans (also known as October beans). If you have never picked beans, it is backbreaking work — especially if you are pregnant. The vines grow close to the ground so it is a lot of stooping and bending to find and pick the beans.

After picking a LOT of beans, we had to shell them. We did at least find a way to speed up that process by running the beans through a wringer washing machine to pop the bean out of the pod. At the end of the day, we had an entire washtub full of shelled beans. The beans were then bagged and put in the freezer for the winter.

The following week was tough for us and we had no money to buy food. We went to my in-laws to ask for a bag of the beans to cook for dinner. We were told no, that those beans were for winter.

There was nothing to do but make do.

Back at home, we had two potatoes and an almost empty jar of peanut butter. That became dinner. We ate a baked potato and put peanut butter on the peels and ate those.

I could be bitter about that memory, but I do not feel bitter. I learned a lot from the experience. I learned that family will not always be there when the chips are down. I learned that even difficult times can be held in a positive light. I also learned that when you share hard memories, unscrupulous people can throw it in your face later in life. But no matter what anyone else says, makin’ do holds a powerful lesson.

I do not live in my past stories but they are there and I can choose how I view them. They remind me how resilient I am and by reflecting, I can see how far I have come.

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11 thoughts on “Makin’ Do”

  1. Maggie, another lesson in life and how to not carry the negativity thru life. I always appreciate you sharing these experiences and what you learned.
    BTW, we had the same washing machine, brought home by my dad from the family’s commercial laundry. It was old then but to us it was a fabulous luxury! We used it for laundry but beans would have been interesting!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The washer in question was used for laundry and for beans.

      My mother would not have anything but a wringer washer. All through my high school years we washed our clothes in that machine and hung them on the line to dry.

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  2. Reading through this, I realise that what I considered to be ‘hard times’ in my past were nothing compared to having no food to eat, and getting no help from relatives.
    By comparison, I have lived a life of relative luxury.
    You have certainly come a long way, and should be proud of all your achievements in life.
    Best wishes, Pete.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It was a different time and still I was more fortunate than a lot of people I knew. Lessons learned and gratitude given. I am glad you did not have such worries, Pete.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I always enjoy and appreciate these stories, Maggie. These are the experiences that made you who you are today. When people compliment your insight, abilities, imagination and creativity, they may not realize how you earned and perfected those traits. It’s good that you can make these experiences part of you without getting lost in them.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You’ve found a healthy way to reflect on your memories, taking a lesson from the hardship. Not everyone is able to do that with such grace. I’m sorry any of that happened, but think of what you’ve learned from it. Thanks for sharing it here.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I love how you look at this memory as a learning experience, but how frightening it must have been to be pregnant and not know where your next meal will come from. You really are resilient!

    Like

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