Day 196

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This is such a busy and chaotic world sometimes. We are like a mythological beast with hundreds of tentacles needing to be fed. Each one requires something different of us. In each of us, however, there comes a time when we no longer have the energy to feed the beast and all we need is a minute to breathe — a minute to be heard.

Friendship is the balm we need to ease the distractions of life. A shoulder to lean on or someone to laugh with. We get so busy it is easy to take those relationships for granted.

So many of my friends throughout my life were ‘work friends’ which means that often when the work ends, so does the friendship. The same story goes for friends who are dependent on a circumstance or a place to fuel those flames and keep the friendship alive. Relocation can kill friendships because it isn’t easy any longer.

I have many friends that have withstood the test of time and distance and change. Others did not fare so well. I have come to chalk it up to people evolving at different speeds with different needs. No harm, no foul.

It is important to find your tribe. Those people who are there for you. The ones who call to check up on you. The ones who just seem to be there when you need them.

Old friends are important — they are your past and every phase of you. But as I age, I have come to realize that new friends can be just as important. They are the promise of tomorrow and the supporter of your dreams.

What is most important, regardless of whether the friendship is old or new, is to be there. Reciprocate, love, and support one another. One-sided friendships will not stand the test of time.

I am thankful today for friendships old and new. And I will always strive to be a better friend than I have ever been.


11 thoughts on “Friendship”

  1. We are so lucky to have been brought together as family, which has grown a very valued friendship. 😍

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  2. You are so dear to me Maggie and you are such a good friend. I love you, always and always.

    Sending a gentle, warm hug your way…


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  3. Oh my goodness. You must be a soul sister! This is exactly what I might have written about friends. I REALLY treasure friends, and feel such a deep sense of loss when they move and our lives go in different directions, or perhaps they pass on, something that happens once we are seniors, and I am definitely that now.

    This made me think back on how friendships used to be in my earlier years (remember a different generation from now). I lived in a town where we never locked our doors in New Mexico. It was a small town and everyone knew everyone. We always had one of those old dark blue with dots on it percolators on the stove. If a friend came by, the tradition was that they would come in, fix a cup of coffee and drink it while they waited for us to come back. And if we were gone too long, they would leave a note, wash out their cup and put it in its place where it signified it was theirs (and each friend had a special place for his or her cup). What a wonderful thing that was.

    We wrote real letters to our friends who moved away and we saved all the letters we got from them too. They were genuine treasures to be read and reread when we got lonely for them.

    Then too, we had a potted plant that put out “babies,” and when a friend moved away, it was one of the things we gave them to remember our lives together. And there was the sourdough starter we fed and kept going over the years, to give a part of it to the friend leaving, and then feed it to start it up again. The part about only giving them part of it was not an issue of generosity; it was an issue of something we would be sharing, for we would each be making more bread, and feeding the dough again to be used to give some of it to another friend moving away or some other appropriate reason.

    I think what was so important was that we had these treasures that helped us to remember all our friends. It’s funny how truly comforting those little things were. Even as long ago as it was now, I yearn to make, and likely will make another sourdough starter, and perhaps find one of those plants that makes “babies.” It’s never too late to start the celebration of friends once more. I don’t know what happened that changed it. I might even buy me one of those dark blue metal percolators with the white spots. Oh, it makes me smile in my heart.

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    1. Anne, I have written here on my blog about my love of letters and the written word. I have only a handful of letters from my mother that I cherish above all else.

      I also came from a place where we did not lock our doors. Of course a lot of the people that lived nearby were farmers and did not travel to industrial jobs outside their own land. It was common to gather on the porch and shuck corn or string beans — young and old alike. Such good memories. Now we all seem too rushed and have expectations that everything happen instantaneously. I hope you make your sourdough starter.

      Have a good day.

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